Now it usually takes something quite controversial, irritating or witty for me to get home after yet another dire day at 'The Orifice' and sit down the moment I get through the door, fire up the PC and start writing.
Today is indeed one such day. As I rode home on the 'Cattle Chuffer' from Victoria I began scanning 'The London Paper' for newsworthy articles that didn't include the words Goody, Channel 4, Pete Doherty and Snow.
I was indeed drawn to page 7 and a fine pair of pins in a micro skirt. Below was a rather disturbing headline 'Judge Held For Flashing' and to the left of that a typically demure picture of Wayne Rooney with his gob open and looking pretty vacant......well nothing new there then. Believe me the excitement does not end there as it was suggested that 'The Everton Reject' was a massive fan of, and indeed knew all the words to the songs of the musical 'Oliver.'
So what I hear you holler as you lean towards the 'off button.' Is there indeed a point to all this? Are the three subjects in someway all related?
Well no, not to my knowledge anyway!
But wait.......In the top right hand corner was an inch square article that literally made me think.... you are bloody joking! It was both amusing and unbelievable at the same time. In fact I felt it was well worth sharing with other like minded individuals.
So the story goes that in Argentina a teenage football fan is suing a tattooist who drew a penis on his back instead of his favourite team's badge. Not an easy mistake to make surely, but as it happens the tattoo artist took 'umbrage' at being asked to draw the logo of the Boca Juniors on the teens back because he supported their fiercest rivals River Plate!!!!!!!!!!!!
My immediate forethought was if the tattoo artist is that malevolent, then imagine what he would do to you if he caught you messing with his missus!
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